The ABCs of Anger Release
The ABCs of Anger Release
Let’s talk about anger.
It shows up in every home, with every child, and it’s nothing to be ashamed of.
If you’ve ever seen your child stomp, shout, or clench their fists, you know how big anger can feel in a little body. It’s tough—for them and for you. But here’s the good news: anger isn’t “bad.” It’s a signal. And kids can learn safe ways to let it out instead of holding it in.
Why movement helps
When kids feel angry, their bodies get flooded with energy—hearts race, muscles tighten, and brains go into “fight or flight.” That’s the nervous system gearing up for action.
Here’s the neuroscience in simple terms: moving the body helps calm the brain. Physical activity uses up that extra energy and tells the nervous system, “You’re safe now.” Once the body settles, kids are more ready for problem-solving, breathing, or talking things through.
Coping exists on a spectrum
Not every child can sit still and breathe when they’re upset—and that’s okay. Coping strategies range from calm and quiet to active and powerful. Both ends of the spectrum are important.
That’s why I created the ABCs of Anger Release—a playful, easy way to give kids options.
The ABCs of Anger Release
Here are just a few examples from the list of 26 fun, safe movement ideas:
A – Air punches: Punch the air like a superhero.
C – Crab walk: Scuttle across the room and shake it off.
M – March like a soldier: Strong steps, arms swinging.
R – Rip paper: Tear up scrap paper or old magazines.
S – Scream into a pillow: Safe, muffled, and effective.
Z – Zip outside: Run, jump, or roll in the grass.
(And yes, there’s a movement idea for every single letter!)
Quick tips for parents
Normalize anger: Say, “It’s okay to feel mad. Everyone feels angry sometimes.”
Offer choices: “Do you want to do jumping jacks or rip paper?”
Model it yourself: Show them how you walk it off, shake your arms, or push against a wall when frustrated.
Prepare the space: Keep safe items like pillows, scrap paper, or balls handy for release.
Final thought
When kids learn healthy ways to release anger, you’re not just diffusing a tantrum—you’re teaching them how to handle emotions for life. Anger becomes less scary, more manageable, and even empowering.
So the next time your child is bubbling over, don’t just say, “Calm down.” Offer them an outlet. Flip a pillow, crab walk across the room, or step outside together. You’ll be amazed at how movement can turn big feelings into new confidence.
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by Akejah McLaughlin, Play Therapist