Executive Function, Part 1: What It Is and What to Look Out For
If your child can explain a math concept perfectly but forgets to turn in the homework or can clean their room in a burst of motivation but can't seem to start on a normal Tuesday, you're not watching a motivation problem. You're watching executive function in action — or, more often, in struggle.
What Is Executive Function?
Executive function is the set of mental skills that let us plan, start tasks, manage time, hold information in mind, control impulses, and shift between ideas. Think of it as the brain's project manager. It's not about intelligence — plenty of bright, capable kids have executive function skills that lag behind their academic ability.
These skills develop gradually, well into a person's mid-20s, with the biggest growth spurts happening in early childhood and again in adolescence. That means executive function struggles in kids and teens are often developmentally normal, not a character flaw.
The Core Skills to Know
Working memory — holding information in mind while using it (like remembering instructions while doing them)
Inhibitory control — resisting impulses and distractions
Cognitive flexibility — shifting between tasks or adjusting when plans change
Planning and prioritizing — breaking a goal into steps and sequencing them
Task initiation — actually starting, even when a task isn't interesting
Emotional regulation — managing frustration without it derailing everything else
What to Look Out For
Some difficulty with these skills is normal at every age. Pay closer attention if you notice a pattern that's out of step with your child's age or is affecting their daily life:
Chronic difficulty starting homework or chores, even ones they say they want to do
Losing track of multi-step instructions almost immediately
Big emotional reactions to small changes in plans
Consistently losing belongings, missing deadlines, or forgetting things they were just told
A gap between what they know they should do and what they actually do
If these patterns are persistent, intense, and cross multiple settings (home, school, activities), it's worth exploring with a professional — executive function challenges are a hallmark of ADHD, but they also show up with anxiety, learning differences, and simply slower-maturing skills.
What Does Working With an Executive Function Coach Look Like?
If you or your child keep hearing "just try harder" or "be more organized," you already know that advice doesn't work. Effort usually isn't the problem. The missing piece is skills and systems that fit how your brain works. Here's what executive function coaching actually looks like.
As shared above, Executive Function skills help us plan, organize, manage time, start tasks, and follow through. Challenges often show up with ADHD, and they can also appear with autism, a brain injury, other brain-based differences, or no diagnosis at all.
Getting Started
Coaching begins with a free discovery call to talk about what's been hard and whether coaching is a good fit. Next is an intake session. For students, I meet with both the parent and the student, with one-on-one time for the student so they feel ownership of the process. For adults, the intake is one-on-one.
What Happens in a Session
Most sessions follow a similar rhythm:
Check in on the past week: what worked and what got in the way.
Find the real barrier. "I didn't study" usually has a reason underneath it.
Build a strategy that fits, like breaking a project into steps or planning backward from a deadline.
Set a clear plan for the week: what, when, and where.
I don't hand out answers. I ask questions that help clients discover what works for them, because solutions people find themselves are the ones they keep using.
Coaching Alongside Therapy
Therapy helps clients work through emotions and mental health. Coaching focuses on action: plans, systems, and follow-through. Many clients benefit from both, and at Birch Therapy, with permission, I can work with a client's therapist, so everyone supports the same goals.
What Progress Looks Like
Progress is steady rather than dramatic: a student who starts a project a week early, or a parent who reminds less because their teen has a system. Over time, strategies become habits, and clients need less outside structure. That independence is the real goal.
Gigi Miller, Certified Neurodiversity Coach
Ready to learn more? Schedule a free discovery call with Gigi Miller, CNC®, ACC, at 404.274.1930 or gigi@birchtherapypllc.com.
Next up, Part 2: Practical, everyday tips for building these skills at home.